This Past (Past) Week

Where oh where have we been these past two weeks? Where were we, as self-professed football fanatics, when our team choice won? Where were were to gently mock Iker Cassillas' blubbering tears? And to capitalize on the moment by spamming our blog with Dahhvid Villa's mug

plastered all over? Shit, that's not gonna stop us.

All higgedly-piggedly like. Look at that face, bless him. The Ayrabs here celebrated like there was no tomorrow, honking yelling skidding along in their cars all night. Guns were brought out and shots fired in the air, and in Jordan, land of moronic people, one of these shots caught an old woman who died on the spot. Only Arabs...

Where were we when we missed the first lady of Arabic hip hop Shadia Mansour's private party at the Snowbar? Our Good Shit/mazzika section is all about hip hop, the sound of revolution etc etc etc, so how could we miss an opportunity like this? Oh well. By the way, Shadia's music is pretty amazing. She has a lovely voice that can switch to cutting edge lyrics in a second.

EU foreign policy cheif Catherine Ashton visited Gaza, humanitarian aid ships from Libya were refused access to Gaza's waters, and Gaza's borders with Egypt are open indefinitely, perhaps a sign of Mubarak's impending death? That's where our summer vacation will be! Fingers crossed.

Today starting from 8 AM fireworks punctured the periwinkle sky at rapid succession. The Tawjeehi results, which are the end of year results of 12th grade students and not high school elections as one foreigner explained sagely, are out and the names of the students who passed are in the newspapers. On campus, there were groups huddled around pouring over the long columns of tiny names, seeing whether their siblings/cousins/relatives/neighbors/friends/enemies passed or not, and just what their exact average is. One girl was passing out knafe! Mabrook/mazel tov, let the crazy nights and crazier parties begin. Our headaches are starting from now.

Lowkey was detained at Ben Gurion Airport Tuesday for half a day before being released. Wherever he's going, we're clawing our way to hang on to his coat tails.

A small meeting commenced today concerning the Right to Education conference taking part on the 27th and 28th of July. The aim is to build a global network of students concerned with the education rights of Palestians living in the Occupied Territories. We've signed up for this, and some 40 international students are expected to join in. Spread the word!

Links and Rants

Jon Voight. Better known as the guy who gave his Y chromosome that begot the former sexy Angelina Jolie (for us, she lost her appeal after having/picking up so many babies). He's 71, white, male, loaded, and a northern American. His contacts may include Sarah Palin and Rush Limbaugh, and all the other racist Tea Party goers. He, as any other sane person, is not happy with Obama and the way the president is running the country. He, like any other sane person, wrote a letter to express his opinions and frustrations, addressing the problems that in his opinion Obama is responsible for. Fair enough, after all this is the President who has no problem in ordering the assassination of US citizens on foreign soil, denies habeas rights to suspected terrorists, and loves being an ass in general. But back to Voight's letter, of which the content is unsurprisingly insane and full of poppycock.

"You will be the first American president that lied to the Jewish people, and the American people as well, when you said that you would defend Israel, the only Democratic state in the Middle East, against all their enemies," Voight wailed. "You have done just the opposite. You have propagandized Israel, until they look like they are everyone's enemy-and it has resonated throughout the world. You are putting Israel in harm's way and you have promoted anti-Semitism throughout the world."

Hm, we remember Obama at the Cairo conference a couple years back vowing to uphold the Arab countries' interests and values while serving to improve relations with the US. So, yeah Obama is a certified liar, but that's just another term for a politician. Ok time to break it down.

"The only Democratic state in the Middle East." Bitch please. Refer back to the wonderfully insidious (ok, it's actually pretty docile) website theonlydemocracy.org . But then Voight can't have known about the fact that this Democratic state has no internationally recognized borders? And that it is an occupying force devastating the lives of millions of measly Palestinians? Or that it harbors nuclear power? And that it gives automatic citizenship based on Religion and religion only? And that it is a Jewish state whose rights are exclusive to Jews, and not say, Palestinian citizens of Israel? What a flawed concept hmm.

"You have propagandized Israel and they look like they are everyone's enemy..." How exactly? By exerting the minimal pressure regarding the on-going illegal settlement building in Jerusalem and the West Bank? Oh how can we say that, this minimal pressure is not at all standardized political hogwash, a poor pantomime for the world. This minimal pressure was the cause for US-Israeli relations to reach the lowest point ever! Perhaps, by this minimal pressure, the world got a glimpse of what Israeli claims itself to be and what it is in reality. Oh, the demonization!

Ok, we can't be bothered with the rest, but of course it is all Obama's fault for promoting Anti-Semitism when the world took to the streets protesting loudly at the Israeli attack and murder of civilians aboard a humanitarian ship 3 weeks ago. You know, sarcasm aside, it partly is his fault, after all his administration continues the American tradition of supplying Israel with 3 billion dollars in military aid. But then, Obama isn't the one that gave the order from Canada to go ahead with the flotilla attack. Nooooo that was someone called Netanyahu. Right, Jon Voight, you are a clueless deluded silly ignorant old man, and now we know the reason for Angelina estranging you. After Sean Penn's lauding of Hugo Chavez, the Conservatives sought to bring this upon us? Ha.

Gilad Shalit and Palestinian Prisoners. Shalit's parents started their march to Jerusalem on Friday commemorating their son's 4th year in captivity. They will stay at a protest tent erected a year ago and pressure the Israeli government to secure Shalit's release. This goes to show, more than anything, the incompetence and seemingly indifferent view of the Israeli government, who apparently are portraying that the release of Shalit is not in their best interests, in contrast to their repeated rhetoric and assurances. One soldier in return for the release of Palestinian women and children and 300 other detainees. No? Ok, no Gilad. This is the way it works. The torture and detainment of Palestinian children is of course illegal under international law, and when we hear that a child's testicles are being electrocuted by Israeli interrogators who sneer in the child's face "you will never be able to become a father" vitriolic rage renders us senseless. Dear oh dear, we wonder how that child's mother must feel? Aviva Shalit at least can be 'comforted' with the knowledge that her brave son was serving with the Lions and fulfilling his duty to his state, and not say, captured while loitering at some alley.

Gaza Electricity Blackout. Again and again and again, the only power plant in Gaza has ran out of fuel to operate and the tiny coastal strip is plunged into darkness once again. Gazans will now have to go 15 hours a day without electricity and depend on Israel and Egypt for some. Imagine going 15 hours a day with no TV, computers, telephones, refrigerators, hot water, etc. An EU contribution to fuel shipments to Gaza was transferred (intercepted more like) by the rotten PA, who cited budget constraints. How much more do they have to bend over backwards for Israel?

World Cup Ponderings. Why do people support the teams they do? Political motivation is the main reason according to our parents and their generation. Brazilian flags are seen everywhere, rippling from windows and cars and stores, and all because Brazil kicked out its Israeli ambassador. We won't lie, if Turkey had qualified we would have been behind them religiously. But you see...Spain does have delectable players who can actually play, and Argentina...well it's Argentina for God's sake! We were so happy USA got knocked out by Ghana, before a snapshot of a memory caused us to pause. Back in 2006, after Ghana had beaten some team, one team member celebrated by waving the Israeli flag in front of cameras. What a blow. We wish we had selective retainment dammit. Anyhoo, it seems only fair that the other colonialist power in the world should be defeated, so England, we are humbly awaiting your exit. To show our good sportsmanship, we won't delight at your red sun burned skin or your tears, because your poor judgement clouds the inevitable i.e. you should have had it coming. England winning the world cup? What next, elephants flying to the moon? Teehee!

The Yankees Get it Right

What a display of blundering ineptitude! Thanks for the laugh NY Post :)

This Past Week

Monday: Our last day of freedom, of laziness, of unprecedented lie-ins. 17 hours is our record. We spent that day trying hard not to mope about the dawning summer classes, heart to heart talks up on the rooftop, stuffing our faces, and clinging sloth-like to whatever comfortable furniture in our way.

News that Iran is to send humanitarian aid ships with the Iranian Revolutionary Guard escorting them makes our hearts flutter a bit. Could this be if it were indeed carried out the catalyst for World War III? Neocons and Zionuts certainly need no rational reason to wage war. If the Mavi Marmara flotilla carried terrorists affiliated with Hezbollah and Al-Qaeda who were armed with butter knives then God knows what these Iranian aid ships might have on board...Hitler's spawn and nails yanked out of planks. Now naturally, we believe that any country has the right to send whatever kind of humanitarian aid it can supply to break an immoral and illegal siege that has devastated the lives of 1.5 million civilians trapped on a tiny strip of land. If the U.S and Israel want to seize this act as a pretext to decimate Iran because of the threat it imposes with its nuclear power (completely glossing over the fact that Israel has nuclear power as well) then this calls for a specialized team of Bristows and Vaugns to perform a top notch secret operation that involves tightening the screws and possibly using injections of brain intelligence delivered to the white folks that run this earth. We did not sound like conspiracy theorists there at all. So far, numerous countries have announced that they are putting together another flotilla, bigger and better than before, with 50 ships and more than 4 thousand volunteers signed up so far. Haitham Sabbah, editor of Palestine Think Tank published this somewhat controversial piece stating his firm opinion that Iran is only using this situation where international outcry at Israel's terrorist actions on the flotilla is loud and ringing for its own propagandist reasons, and that these reasons might come at the expense of the Gazan civilians. Make what you want of that.

Tuesday: 1st day of summer classes. Naturally we didn't go, preferring sleep and our mental health.

Wednesday: Enough faffing about, we rose like Shaun of the Dead and made our way back to the university, only to sit around doing nothing as 1 in 3 teachers showed up. Helen Thomas, the longest serving White House correspondent, stated that Israelis should "get the hell out of Palestine...They should go home. To Germany, Poland, America and everywhere else." Naturally, the 89 year old has been slaughtered with vitriolic self-righteous Zionist words, being called everything from an anti-Semite (big surprise) to a blundering old fool (unfair) to a xenophobic (never side with the brown people) to an infiltrator terrorist (we bet) to a sandnigger sympathizer (we know) to a Mujahida (we did not see that one). Never mind we made up the last three accusations, they have been made and we don't need credible sources to cite from. She was pressured to resign, after 50 years on the job. Freedom of speech once again, prepare to get slandered!

Thursday: Back in it again, this time some improvement seeing as 2 out of 3 teachers showed up. We got invited to the Youth Boycott Movement in the beautiful village of Jifna, but after reading more about it and discovering that the boycott movement is for the settlement products only, we tossed our heads and gave a derisive snort. When will they ever learn...there is no difference between Israeli settlement products and Israeli products..key word ISRAELI. The Karama (Dignity) Pledge is an insult, but then again it was devised by the Palestinian Authority so that explains it. See the farcical connection here or do we have to elaborate more..well why not. The rotten PA has taken it upon themselves to expel any settlement products from the areas it controls and to fine/imprison anybody selling them. It's a LAW now, something to make them feel a tad more pretentious. They devised this great big thing called the Karama Pledge which people sign their names onto a piece of paper, affirming that from now on they won't buy said sordid products. A campaign ripped off of Intajuna called Min Beit la Beit (From House to House) has 3000 volunteers going around houses and educating the inhabitants on the detrimental results of buying settlement goods. They also distribute a list of settlement products/companies and the alternatives that can be bought instead. Don't get us wrong, we're glad that some form of political group has finally undertaken the initiative of boycotting, but limiting this boycott to settlements only is so wrong. The impression people get is that boycotting settlement products is now a must but Israeli products can still be bought and consumed. Hypocrisy at its slinkiest best, and if we see one more Goddamn yellow sticker declaring YOU AND YOUR CONSCIENCE we'll do more than scream like raving lunatics in the middle of the street. We might resort to running around naked. We might.

Friday: The 11th of June!!!!!!!!!!!!!Can only mean one thing!!!!!!!!!! WORLD CUP 2010!!!!!!!!!! We've been waiting YEARS for this (specifically, 4) and we gobbled up every moment of the opening ceremony. Favorite part hands down? Archbishop Desmond Tutu getting his groove on complete with scarf and hat. We would like to pinch his cheeks for this, how adorable was that? We figured that a snapshot of this would go viral, yet our search engines have come up with nothing. We'll keeping searching, someone must have it...Our teams of choice? Argentina and Spain. It would be hilarious of Argentina won, imagine Maradona's inflatable ego soaring past the seven heavens all the while giving the finger to everyone who mocked and denounced his skills as a manager and a recovering crack addict. But we shouldn't get ahead of ourselves with such fantasies. To be honest with ourselves though...we expected a whole lot more from the opening ceremony. There were parts we didn't get (what's up with that giant beetle?) and we needed more joyous singing and dancing. And we couldn't believe that there were hundreds of empty seats in the stadium! Possibly reserved for us and our extended families.

One last thing, just to bring people's attention to this. Translated video of what went down in the Knesset when MK Hanin Zoabi tried to speak. The only democracy in the middle east harasses and name calls and accuses and slanders a fellow MK for trying to speak the truth, that Israel is a terrorist bigoted arrogant militaristic state.

Ms Zoabi, we have immense respect for you. Plus you're hot, with those good old Palestinian looks. Love.