Abbas' Palestine State

I graduated from Stupid to PLEASEGODSHUTMEUPNOW

All we can ever hear whenever Abbashole opens his mouth is a lot of Frankensteinian grunts and growls and slurring. In his speeches he freezes his whole facial expression like a bullfrog about to breathe (or whatever it is that they do with that engorging flap of skin under their chins-attract mates?) and delivers a growling, slurry monotone punctuated by grunts and possible flatulence.

So what has this self-titled president been up to since the baseless unity talks with Hamas? Who cares and who knows. He spends more than half of his time outside the country trying to find an evil inventor with a shock of white hair and a lightning bolt scar on his forehead to make him a flying carpet out of the millions of dollars he stole from the Palestinian people.

Even this article, which we strongly suspect was ghost-ridden by one of Max Clifford's protégés has done very little to boost his popularity or thankfully the fascist mentality of "Our Father". But let's take a closer look...

The article starts off in the third person, a feature befitting all thieving authoritarian megalomaniacs. Back when he was known as Mahmoud, he was ethnically cleansed at the age of thirteen from his town Safad in north Palestine. Then the article delves into the pros of how recognizing a Palestine state is beneficial to everyone. He points out that the last time Palestinian statehood was addressed was back in 1947 when the UN graciously decided to cut the land up and give the majority to some white alien settler population. The Zionist trolls accuse Palestinians of being an inherently war-mongering people because they rejected this partition, thereby rejecting peace. It's a bit overwhelming how readily people can form their opinions without ever opening up a history book or reading some basic information. Copies of Herzl's diary are available, there's an endless plethora of Ben Gurion quotes and sadistic intentions formalized into action, and yet all of this readily accessible evidence that show what the true purpose of Israel on Palestinian land gets swallowed up in favor of justifying it through religious discourse and plain self-righteousness. But we digress.

We can't help from wandering off topic though. This article makes for some hot and steamy bullshit. Take this excerpt for example:

Our quest for recognition as a state should not be seen as a stunt; too many of our men and women have been lost for us to engage in such political theater. We go to the United Nations now to secure the right to live free in the remaining 22 percent of our historic homeland because we have been negotiating with the State of Israel for 20 years without coming any closer to realizing a state of our own. We cannot wait indefinitely while Israel continues to send more settlers to the occupied West Bank and denies Palestinians access to most of our land and holy places, particularly in Jerusalem. Neither political pressure nor promises of rewards by the United States have stopped Israel’s settlement program.

Too many of our men and women have lost their lives....with the blessing of your little collaborative incumbency. Was Arafat seriously drugged when he signed the Oslo Accords? There is no other explanation. The resultant PA is in charge of key cities and towns in the West Bank but Israel controls the surrounding areas, meaning that Palestinians need permits to get from one area to the next. A blueprint disaster. Oh we can go on and on about the Oslo agreement...and guess what? We don't want to "secure the right to live in 22 percent of our historic homeland". The term "historical Palestine" is a verbally political trap. STOP USING IT. It implies that oh, its historic so what's past is past, let us talk about the modern day homeland. The same way that historically Syria was part of the Ottoman empire. The same way that historically the French owned the state of Louisiana. Palestine homeland is the whole land, not just 22 percent of its historicity. Sheesh. Also, Israel sending more settlers in the West Bank and denying Palestinians their right to access their lands is something that Abbashole colluded in.

Onwards, ye patient ones.

The State of Palestine intends to be a peace-loving nation, committed to human rights, democracy, the rule of law and the principles of the United Nations Charter. Once admitted to the United Nations, our state stands ready to negotiate all core issues of the conflict with Israel. A key focus of negotiations will be reaching a just solution for Palestinian refugees based on Resolution 194, which the General Assembly passed in 1948.

Sorry, committed to human rights, democracy, etc based on what standards exactly? The PA's brutal crackdown on dissenters? Discriminate targeting of people with the wrong political affiliation? Banning any supporter of Hamas from working in its ministries? The jailing and torturing of those who dared to speak out against the police state the West Bank under Abbashole's regime became? And we are to believe that getting a decent job won't involve any kind of nepotism? And that USaid projects will run its course throughout the country, trading smooth roads for a more subservient state to Israel? CAN WE HAVE THE LEGISLATIVE ELECTIONS ALREADY!

And then, the self-aggrandizing windbag goes on in the same breath to mention the Right of Return. The fact that he's in his 70's and therefore more vulnerable to senility than the average Palestinian definitely doesn't excuse his rambling. But how can he even think to assume that Palestinians are a forgetful lot? Hello, Palestine Papers! Saeb Erekat and his band of negotiators acknowledged that granting refugees their right of return is out of the question. Olmert proposed that over a five year span ten thousand refugees will be allowed back in but they won't have voting rights. Ten thousand out of 6 million. Take it or leave it. And then the GALL, the absolute nerve of him to even mention negotiations.

What is sheer pissing ironic is that this bloated article is still seen as simply unacceptable and indigestible for all of the wrong reasons.