Saturday, April 24, 2010

Fashion Fugs

New feature peeps! This is to chronicle the 'whats-in' at BZU. And it'll be strictly limited to snarking at only the female bizarre/ostentatious/stomach-lurching/insane/ill-fitting choice of whatever apparel they choose to swaddle themselves in with some accessorizing. Girls prove to be more creative and bold in this department, because we can summarize the male fashion choice as the following:
  • Tight low rise jeans with short hideous shirts. Accessory: hairy butt crack.*
  • Normal jeans and a normal/ugly shirt. Accessory: Nike/Adidas shoes
  • Baggy jeans with a shirt that falls to the knees, preferably a Southpole one. Accessory: a silver chain and Attitude, which comes off as Ridiculousness. These represent a tiny minority.
* Impotency comes as a bonus feature.

Now for the females. Recent wide-spread epic is the tiny little thin long strap purses that can barely fit a Jew's nose. Man, we gotta stop with the whole stereotyping thing or we'll lose our massive reader base.

This is actually from Forever21 but we couldn't find/too lazy to search for the tacky metal studded faux leather shantat we see festering on the shoulders of 95 percent of the female population on campus.
Now, a more stylish chic/casual (are we displaying our fashion ineptness here?) handbag wouldn't be so bad, but the reason why we have a problem with them is that..they don't fit anything! And when this particular bag is being toted off to college, why would the girls burden their own hands and wrists from carrying the four books and two notebooks when they can just as easily get larger purse to do the job for them? Spare us the cliches of fashion not supposed to make sense etc. We shall fight for this quixotic mania gripping the brains of airheads in favor for more reasonable, durable alternatives! Why we insist on making this our personal problem is beyond us. Carry on.

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