Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Looney Tunes

Dangerous Lunatics aren't the ones locked up in padded rooms with their mobility fixed due to their tightly strapped in straitjackets. No, they are leaders of social/religious/community centers, preaching hatred and intolerance to their flock of sheep, gesticulating ferociously while frothing madly at the mouth. With handlebar moustaches. Enter Pastor Terry Jones. Please, we are so sick and tired of hearing and seeing his mug on our screens. There's a link here and a link there and oh, there's another one also. Goodbye, sayanora, we didn't care before we sure as hell don't care now. Just one of those get-famous-quick schemes:

Recipe for Presupposed Disaster:
One bigoted man of God
30 person congregation
One outlandish "shockingly" zealous idea
Reaction of notables

Dump them all in a transparent mixing bowl, and pour the bothersome media awareness generously while whipping it all together. Result? A creamy load of shit that just made Martha's newest cookbook for the addition of the dabbling of the President of a superpower country.

Terry. Oh Terry. Your plan to seek fame and recognition has worked, because instead of belittling your crazy ideologies and antics by ignoring you like the unlovable punk you are, the powerful force of the media decided otherwise. No, they decided to thrust you right in the limelight, garnering outcries and condemnations and protests and best of all...INTERVIEWS! Although, had your plan actually worked out, these interviews would have turned into vicious hate mail and a public flaying of your skin, because your extremist views would have set off a chain reaction of other extremist views, and hey, first it was the Twin Towers, next it could be..Sarah Palin's Alaskan Russian-viewing house. Over and done with.

Next we have the equally unlovable punk that calls itself Glenn Beck fighting for the, nay, restoring the honour of Americans. But is he really all that he seems to be? (Sorry to ruin it, but yes.)

Oh, oh! The whole Ground Zero Mosque fiasco!
1) It's not a mosque
2) It's not built at the site of Ground Zero.
Oh, so it must be more fear-mongering and vilification of the Muhamadets! Those pesky conservatives!

The army of stupid is rising, Tea Partiers are taking over the woooooorld!!
(PS, masturbation is a SIN!)

Our first teenage crush, Jon Stewart, has called for sanity! What we wouldn't give to be able to go to this one..

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